Parenting Adolescents
Gripped with ODD

Adolescent children have a reputation for being oppositional particularly when they feel tired, hungry, stressed or upset about something. They may at one time or another resist, talk back, disobey, argue with and defy elders, such as parents, teachers, authority and other adults. These behaviors may also arise during times of significant transition, stress or a crisis. Being oppositional is considered a natural part of development for young children and adolescents.

Oppositional behavior, however, can become a serious concern when the defiant conduct occurs frequently and consistently as compared with other young people. It can be a cause of worry if it affects various aspects of the child’s life, including family, social, and academic. Due to their rebellious nature, it may be tough at times to differentiate a strong-willed or emotional child from one with oppositional defiant disorder (ODD).

There’s a big range of difference between the typical independence-seeking behavior of teens and ODD. It takes parenting an adolescent gripped with ODD to understand the condition and experience the exhaustion, isolation, shame and feelings of helplessness associated with it.

A Home where ODD Dwells

There is a range of estimates on the prevalence of ODD among children and adolescents. Evidence suggests that ODD affects six percent of all children in the United States. Although the disorder seems to be more rampant in lower socioeconomic groups, ODD can be a cause of distress for families of all backgrounds. It has no regard for age, race, size, or gender. Certainly, there are domestic situations to help you know if you are living with someone struggling with ODD.

You live in a home where everyone is careful not to agitate the aggressive behavior of one child with tendency to stir up trouble and constantly push everyone to their limits. The same child consumes all your emotional resources, leaving you barely enough energy to give to your other children. The child’s rude and insubordinate behavior in school and other settings is often a source of embarrassment for you and your family. You are likely constantly on edge while restraining yourself from yelling at or disciplining a child who does not respect you or show remorse for any misbehavior.

Despite all the best parenting approaches you have tried, you may feel that nothing works with your adolescent child who exhibit behaviors characteristically associated with ODD. It can leave you confused, frustrated, guilty, disappointed and angry. Without really knowing how to properly respond to such defiant behavior and what disciplinary consequences to mete out, you may feel exhausted and irritable. As a result, you can become unpleasant to be with thus you and your spouse may end up in never-ending arguments.

More Than Growing Pains

Oppositional defiant disorder (ODD) is a disorder characterized by negative, disobedient or defiant behavior. Children and adolescents go through a natural developmental process of gaining a stronger sense of identity. During this difficult period, most children exhibit a “testing” behavior. The defiant characteristics of ODD tend to persist longer and more severe, but not so extreme to the point of violating social rules or limits.

Unlike growing pains typically undergone by most children and teenagers, an ODD-affected youth is prone to challenge and push authorities to their limits. If your adolescent child is very often engaged in rule-breaking and frequent arguing, he or she is likely to have oppositional defiant disorder.

Identifying the Signs and Symptoms

The fourth edition of the American Psychiatric Association’s handbook, Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, (DSM-IV-TR), categorizes ODD as a disruptive behavior disorder with the following symptoms:

  • Frequent tantrums or loss of temper
  • Excessive arguments with adults
  • Actively refuses or defies requests or rules
  • Deliberately irritates or upsets people
  • Tendency to blame others for his or her misbehavior or mistakes
  • Sensitive to criticisms
  • Easily annoyed by others
  • Frequent anger outburst and quick to show resentment
  • Revenge seeking and full of spite

The list provides help to some degree, but caution needs to be exercised since some disorders appear similar to ODD. For instance, some symptoms exhibited by depressed children, such as anger and irritability, can be misdiagnosed as ODD. There is also much confusion in how to differentiate an explosive teen from one with ODD. Bipolar children are easily mistaken as being explosive or having ODD. All too often these behavioral issues are misdiagnosed and mistreated with inappropriate therapies, which is extremely risky. The need to properly identify the differences between all these conditions cannot be undervalued.

Harnessing the Strengths of an ODD Child

Children will decide who they want to be and eventually, it is up to them to realize their goals. It is not different with oppositional defiant children. They have always existed, only they were referred differently – rebels. Due to their defiance in accepting the norms, they brought about changes in society. They offered many opportunities for everyone’s personal growth.

On a positive note, the stubborn stance of ODD children and teens is the strength that empowers them to be different. Many famous and successful people were oppositional while growing up and pursuing their dreams. Worth mentioning are Steve Jobs and James Lehman, creators of Apple and Total Transformation, respectively. Although both lived with ODD, they became influential people who went on to significantly impact others. The world could have been a boring place if there were no ODD-affected people like them.

Resolving Your Teen Child’s Behavior Issues with Help

It is not easy to be a parent of an ODD teen. Your child may challenge you and thrive on the chaos that results from the battles. You may feel lost as to what kind of parenting techniques to use to rein in your child’s behavior. Sometimes, you may question yourself if it is your fault that your child has turned out to be defiant and unresponsive to your love, care and support. It can leave you vulnerable and feeling like you are being harshly judged as an incompetent parent. In fact, it can feel very lonely to be raising an ODD teen.

Is there hope for your adolescent child? Can peace in your home be restored? How can you help your oppositional defiant teen?

Seeking early treatment for ODD is the wise choice for easier resolution to occur, it also increases the chances of reversing its negative effects on both your child and your family. ODD is often accompanied by other serious behavioral health conditions. It is, therefore, critical to identify and treat ODD as soon as you suspect your child is affected by it to ensure the best chance for success. If left untreated, ODD can develop into a more severe disruptive conduct disorder (CD). Untreated, ODD has an increased risk for substance abuse and juvenile delinquency.

Giving up hope is not an option. If you are concerned about your child’s condition or question your own ability to parent an adolescent child gripped with ODD, Carolina Counseling Services – Pittsboro, NC may be the answer. While there is no “one-size-fits-all” treatment, there is a right fit therapist independently contracted with CCS – Pittsboro, NC who can tailor the most effective treatment plan to match the needs and behavioral symptoms of your child. Seeking counseling to help resolve your child’s behavior issues may prove beneficial.

Call now to schedule an appointment. The earlier treatment is provided, the more likely for your teen child to regain self-esteem and develop healthy patters of relating to others.