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How to Stop Anxiety from Untying Your Marriage Bond

Marriage Anxiety


How to Stop Anxiety from Untying Your Marriage Bond


No marriages are exactly alike, but nothing can bring more joy to life than a beautiful, satisfying relationship. While the depth of happiness found in a fulfilling marriage is almost unfathomable, nothing can bring so much heartache than a broken relationship with someone you promised to share your life, in sickness and in health.

There are basic characteristics or personality traits that are likely to create or break a marriage bond. The quintessential features of love, patience, loyalty, friendliness, and fun are important to the health of any relationship. When it comes to predicting a marriage downfall, anxiety tops the list for its ability to steal romance and loosen the tie that binds married couples.


Blaming Anxiety for Marriage Meltdown

The Anxiety and Depression Association of America (ADAA) conducted a study to assess the impact of anxiety on relationships of people with “Generalized anxiety Disorder” or GAD. The study suggests that GAD-affected individuals have a lesser chance of staying in a healthy and supportive, intimate relationship than those without the disorder. The findings, although specifically generated from respondents with GAD, are considered to be true for other types of anxiety disorders. They are as follows:

  • Sufferers are twice as likely to have at least one relationship problem with their significant other. This includes regular arguments, intimacy issues, communication problems, and social withdrawal.
  • Anxiety impairs the ability of the anxious spouse to perform normal activities with their partner.
  • More than half of the respondents feel as though their relationship with their spouse has a good chance of improving if they were not suffering from an anxiety disorder.


PubMed published an abstract (preliminary study); which revealed that the presence of anxiety disorders in intimate relationships negatively affect its quality.  When one or both spouses have an anxiety disorder, it becomes virtually impossible to live and function normally. Everyday situations that do not matter to other people can cause angst in a partner or even be extremely frightening; experiences which are normally only mildly stressful to most people can be a source of a total panic rampage.  Unfortunately, if you are hoping to have a long-lasting relationship, an anxiety disorder may destroy the love in this relationship.


A Marriage Crumbling Under the Impact of Anxiety

Anxiety can create a “self-absorbed” feeling that can cause the affected spouse to build an emotional wall as protection from the perceived danger in a world sensed to be unsafe and terrifying.  For the anxious spouse, the limiting condition sometimes makes it difficult for him or her to keep jobs, thus, the non-anxious spouse takes on the role of the sole breadwinner while caring for a partner with anxiety problems, the children, and the entire household.

While the anxious spouse immerses in sadness, self-pity, weakness, and irritability, the significant other struggles with difficult feelings, such as resentment, anger, guilt, and hopelessness.

Over time, this can give rise to difficult and negative feelings, such as frustration, sadness, depression, or despair, which may become too much of a strain for the marriage to survive. The overwhelming emotions built up in couples who have pulled away from each other by anxiety, can damage the marital friendship and intimacy; the most essential ingredients for a happy marriage to thrive.

The challenges wrought by anxiety can be unnerving, even for couples who are focused on staying committed to each other. When the symptoms of anxiety go untreated, negative and ugly feelings can develop by huge proportions resulting in couples thinking about ending their miserable union. This is never, and should never be an option, because with treatment, anxiety can be reduced as to allow couples to make and maintain a great, long-lasting, loving relationship.


Regaining Control over Your Marriage

It is advantageous to be informed of what you should know about anxiety to improve your life and your affected relationship. Greater benefits await if you say “yes” to counseling, as a positive step to recovering the marital happiness snatched away by anxiety. This is not the time to be afraid or feel anxious, especially knowing that anxiety disorders can be resolved with appropriate treatment. Whether you or your spouse has the disorder, it is important to muster the strength to seek the help you need.

At a time when anxiety is wrecking your relationship, you must decide whether to continue to suffer and endanger your marriage, or recover, and enjoy a healthy relationship.  With counseling, your goal is to recover and give your relationship renewed life and all the benefits that go along with it. When you do choose to seek counseling, contact Carolina Counseling Services – Pittsboro, and you’ll be matched with the right fit professional, an independently contracted therapist who will work with you and your spouse in curbing the anxiety symptoms which are threatening your marriage. All it takes is to make a call to CCS – Pittsboro to schedule your first session.


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Serving Areas: Carolina Counseling Services

Counties: Chatham, Alamance, Durham, Harnett, Lee, Moore, Orange, Randolph, Wake, NC
Areas: Pittsboro NC, Gulf NC, Hickory Mountain NC, Hadley NC, Siler City NC, Wilsonville NC, Fearrington NC, Mandale NC, Bear Creek NC, Albright NC
Zip Codes: 27312, 27344, 27207, 27228, 27256, 27559


Gail Gustafson, MSW, LCSW

Specializes in: (Ages 9+) Adolescents and Adults, Individuals, Couples and Families. PTSD/Trauma, EMDR, Adoption, Drug/Alcohol/Substance Abuse addiction, Anxiety, Depression, Bi-polar, Life Transitions, Grief and Loss, Parenting, Family, couples and marriage counseling.
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